Where Do Cupcakes & Champagne Fit In
a cautionary tale of mis-alignment
My birthday happened to fall on a Friday that year AND it was rare rooftop weather in March in NYC. The stars and weather gods were aligning in my favor!
As a birthday present to myself I hired a coach for the Timberman Triathlon, a race that I was now doing every year. I was never going to win, but I was curious: if I got a little more dialed in with my training, could I see progress in my race results? I wanted to get faster!
My first clue that something was off was when he sent me the nutrition plan and I VERY GENUINELY asked him where the cupcakes & champagne fit in. He didn’t miss a beat: “They Don’t.”
That should have been my first sign.
But I brushed it off. After all, I had hired this coach to help get me to the next level. I was starting from a baseline of fitness, but his program proved to be a total overhaul of my systems. I pushed through the regimen, but it didn’t feel totally authentic to me. I wasn’t learning, I wasn’t growing, I was just white-knuckling it.
The perfect birthday weekend in NYC: aligned!
My new coach & his all-or-nothing approach: SO mis-aligned.
So what happened? I’m so glad you asked.
I trained with my coach for 4 months, doing things his way. RESULT?!? I beat my previous year time by ONE minute and 36 seconds!
For all that white-knuckling I shaved less than 2 minutes shaved off my race time. Worth it? Hardly.
BUT the story doesn’t end there.
A year and half later I would start my year of the 21 Day Project, and eight months of making small changes to uplevel myself 21 days at a time (and having fun while I was doing it) would prove to be THE most effective method for upleveling and simultaneously getting FASTER at my annual triathlon.
The same race, two years later, using the 21 Day project framework to make one change at time in a way that felt aligned for me: drumroll please…
i was faster at everything! faster at the swim, faster at the bike, faster at the run. a whole whopping TEN minutes faster!! oh and i had the best time ever. not just watch-time but fun-time. i don't even know what is happening! (post from my blog at the time)
I worked with my brain not against it to implement small changes over time in a way that felt aligned with who I was, not something imposed on me and that made all the difference! The difference of 10 minutes and a world of happiness to be exact.
Here’s the lesson I learned: You don’t have to force massive change overnight. In fact, forcing change, especially without meeting yourself where you are usually doesn’t work. The key to real, sustainable progress is starting where you are, implementing changes over time and building on as you go.
Because when you build from where you are, with small, aligned steps, you create real momentum. You’re not overwhelmed by trying to overhaul everything at once and you are supported for SUCCESS. You start with what feels doable and build from there.
It’s not about how fast you can change—it’s about how sustainable that change is.
Sustainable change is at the heart of the 21 Day Project. It’s not about forcing drastic change. It’s about making small, sustainable adjustments that meet you where you are. The goal is to build habits that last, not to overhaul your life in a way that leaves you unhappy and unfulfilled.
Speaking of happy and fulfilled, snapshot from cupcakes & champagne with my besties from that rooftop birthday celebration:
If you’re tired of the all-or-nothing approach and want to build lasting progress, join the next 21 Day Project. We’ll meet you where you are and help you take small, aligned steps toward real, sustainable change. Find out how to join our next challenge at the21dayproject.com.
This is brilliant, one must have fun, and fun motivates!